You need someone new.

I hear this line all the time from my best friend. Every time I call him or text him or email him a random thought or dream regarding my ex-boyfriend we end the conversation with him telling me that I need to move on and find someone new. That is easier said than done.  

It's not that I am dying to get back together with said ex. It's just that I still think about him endlessly. I don't think it's in an obsessive I'm going to kill your pet bunny type of way. But all sorts of little things in my everyday life triggers memories of our time together and it just leads me to think about him.

Every time I eat a fried egg over rice with soy sauce, it's so yummy that it makes me feel thankful for having met him. It’s the best breakfast when you’re slightly hung over. Every time I see a Lacoste polo shirt, or any mention of the NY Giants or NY Mets it immediately transports me back to hours on the couch with my ex watching sports that meant nothing to me but I watched it all because I loved him.

Mostly, I just wonder how he is and how he had been spending his time. Then I start to wonder if he is single or seeing someone. It all starts to get pretty pathetic, pretty fast. (I never said that I was proud of this behavior.) Typically after I've worked myself up into a frenzy of emotion, I'lI call my best friend hyperventilating. At which point he usually talks me off the ledge and tells me to move on and find someone new. It's a vicious cycle that starts off so innocently. It’s been almost a full year since I officially ended it with the ex. How long does it take to move on?